I will save you the details of my motivation to start a new career
– although they would no doubt be relevant to the story – and instead just cut to the probably juiciest and definitely the darkest part of it so far.

I say “so far” because we cannot predict the future, right?
But I’m pretty sure I passed the test, and that the light inside of me will never go out the way it had just few months ago.
Regardless of what will happen.

So what was this dark moment?
It was when I had chosen a path that was solely aimed at worldly success, in (almost) every way.
Not counting my peace of mind and the eternal damnation of my soul, but I’m no expert on the latter.
I have no idea how strikt the access code to the afterlife is, nowadays.

But it definitely included status and admiration within one or two years, and I would be building towards having a state of the art financial portfolio around my retirement, preferably sooner.

There was a catch though:
I would probably make a significant contribution to destroying the world, both in terms of the human & earth resources globalized capitalism draws upon, as well as literally because my work would probably end up being used for military technology.

But I decided that it was about time I grew up and started to play with the big boys.
Innocence and a clear conscience were luxuries an adult could not rely on.

So the decision was already made when a workgroup to help amphibians cross the street, was installed in the city where I live.

This spring, for the first time ever, a road that had hundreds of dead toads and frogs on it every spring, is clean.
There are very few casualties this year, 99.9% was saved.

And I couldn’t go on with my plans to casually destroy the world.
Not with 40 adults saving toads so nearby.

Two days ago, a hedgehog was in the house where I feed them. For 2.5 years I have not missed a day, in feeding them.
But I rarely see one.

This was the biggest hedgehog I had ever seen in my life.
Well fed.

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~Suzanne Beenackers
Catacombe
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